-Standard check-in time is 3 pm, standard check-out time is 11 am. Not the opposite.
-You absolutely must provide a card for incidentals, even if the room/tax is prepaid. Don't travel without owning a credit or debit card, it's just a terrible idea in this world.
-It is a firm social rule that you tip bellstaff. Like waitstaff, they rely on tips for their basic income.
-It is special to have free coffee, wifi, breakfast, parking, toothpaste, water bottles, and/or chocolates. Never be surprised if you have to pay for any of these things.
-Although they are the ones you'd speak with to solve the problem, keep in mind that noisy room neighbors are not the front desk's fault.
-Neither is the weather. Or inconvenient movie theater locations. Or traffic. Or parades. Or poor service at a local restaurant. Or stains in your pants. Or when you wake up on the wrong side of the bed.
-Acting like an asshole does not, contrary to the information in that worldwide memo that must have been sent out, get you better service. It gets you a half-assed and half-hearted attempt to calm you, which sometimes includes a discount or a free upgrade, but it will never get you love. And you squeeze a hell of a lot more free shit out of a front desk agent when she loves you.
Hopefully this has been helpful. Now get out there and travel, folks!
Have YOU hugged a front desk agent today?